Literally the browns current situation is like your favorite restaurant leaving town, and then they open a video store where the restaurant used to be, with the same decorations, and they just show you videotapes of food and tell you how good it is.

The browns used to be a football team. Now they are story time.

To the evidence wheel:
http://www.ohio.com/sports/59285082.html
"But Mangini found bright spots, especially in the play of Quinn, who made just his fourth career start.

''There were a lot of things Brady did that I liked,'' Mangini said. ''I thought he showed a lot of poise. There were times where he gave us a chance on some plays that maybe we wouldn't have had a chance on and he made some adjustments that showed not only a lot of poise, but a lot of awareness.

''I know he's been in the league more than one season, but in terms of experience and starts, it's a young career. For the opening game, I thought he showed a lot of poise.''

Quinn completed 21-of-35 passes for 205 yards and a touchdown with an interception for a 74.1 rating. But that includes going 6-of-7 for 88 yards with a 26-yard TD to tight end Robert Royal in a late-fourth quarter drive, when the outcome was no longer in doubt. Before that, Quinn had hit on 15-of-28 for 117 yards with an interception for a 49.3 rating."

Point #1 "Brady showed alot of poise"

Tom brady showed alot of poise. Brady Quinn punted a ball to the cornerback on a needless deep bomb to Braylon Edwards. Not only did he underthrow him on a 30 yard pass, it came right after Minnesota had scored on a long ass, defender energy draining drive. Quinn threw a shit ball, out of his skill range, and put the defense right back on the field. That's not poise.

Second, Quinn let the ball flip out of his hands like a greek kicker on the next possession. That's the opposite of poise.

Point #2 "There were times when he gave us a chance on some plays"

On the interception, Quinn gave the vikings a chance. I've NEVER seen Derek Anderson underthrow anybody on a floater, and definitely not on a thirty yard throw. This interception would actually seem to qualify as taking a chance away. Maybe in football talk that's a negative chance.

Also, I haven't seen anyone fumble the ball by holding it since Dave "Carney Hands" Kreig was in the league. Garo Yepremeian, Fran Tarkenton and Dave Kreig have made that fumble. That's three people in the history of the league. I'd have to call that fumble a negative chance as well.

On the last drive with the browns down two scores, quinn threw 1 completion on seven plays. Every single pass attempt was for less than the first down marker. Quinn gave them a chance to *not gain* a first down yet he also failed at giving them a chance to *not gain* a first down. Apparently since the chance to not gain a first down is a negative (-) and failure to complete the chance to *not gain* a first down is also a negative (-) the double negative chance makes a positive chance. I get it now. Mangenious, on point with his math. That's seven positives. I'm glad i thought this through because now i feel better.

I stand corrected. Subtracting for the Fumble and Pick, Brady Quinn gave the Browns 5 positive chances.

Point #3 Quinn ended the game with a 74.1 Rating.

Wait, I'm a little dizzy here. The article mitigates this rating by informing us that before a meaningless, tight end driven drive with the browns down 21 points and nary 4 minutes on the clock, Quinn's QB rating was 49.3. So in fairness, - the 74.1 rating shouldn't be taken as too much of a positive?

Really? Normally we'd laude the guy and go apeshit over his surgical evisceration of a team with his 74.1 QB rating, but lets just hold our horses because it's actually not entirely accurate?

There are 9 other QB's with ratings less than Quinn's "inflated." 74.1. Nine. Every single one of those QB's lost. Only four threw for less yards. Quinn's longest pass went for 26 yards. (Jake Delhomme was the only QB with a shorter "longest completion"). How did Quinn gain those 26 yards? He dumped the ball off to Cribbs who made people miss for 17 yards. Quinn's average yards per attempt are six tenths of a yard higher than Jamal Lewis' yards per rush attempt. Just let your brain digest for a minute.

I'm fine with saying Quinn had a better game than Jake Delhomme. Got no problem with that. Let him even keep his inflated stats. JUST DON'T TELL ME IT'S A POSITIVE. 74.1 puts you squarely in the bottom third of the league. And If I may make a supplemental argument to point one, Quinn was Sacked 5 times. Maybe he didn't show awareness on those 5 times, so the negative (-) for awareness and the negative (-) for the sack should be a positive. It's galling to say that we "shouldn't get too excited about the 74.1, because the 49.3 was probably more accurate." Really? I am going to be doing cartwheels because of the 74.1?

Incidentally, the 49.3 would beat out Jamarcus Russell, so Quinn should have been the #1 pick.

This is all evidence that Derek Anderson is an insufferable asshole. There can be no other reason that Quinn starts.